Just Let Go

Letting go doesn't mean giving up, it just means loosening our grip on the things we're trying to control and trusting that God will work it all out in His time. -ME

These last couple of years have been quite a challenge for me in many different ways. I went through a divorce after nearly 7 years of marriage, I went back to school to become a nurse, I've had to work several part time jobs, and I've been raising 2 young children. The transition from married, stay at home mom to single, working mom and college student has been tough. Not to mention the whole post divorce emotional trauma and trying to rediscover who I am now... I've often felt completely out of control!! In the last 6 months or so I've realized something: I AM totally out of control.

When I say this what I mean is God has shown me these past few months that HE is the one in control of my life, not me. We all like to think we have control over what happens in our lives, but we don't, we only have control over how we respond to life's events. And quite honestly I'm glad I don't have the power to manipulate my life because in my selfish human nature, I would mess it up pretty bad! So why then do I live in this constant power struggle between my desires and God's will? Why, if I know He can handle things without my help, do I still fight to get my way? The same reason we all do.. we fear what we don't know.

Fear that we won't be taken care of, fear that we won't be happy, fear that we can't handle what happens to us, fear that we will lose something or someone... we live our lives in fear and this drives us to try to control every situation we encounter. What I've learned is this- I believe with all of my heart that there is absolutely nothing that has happened, is happening or will happen to me that God can’t handle. In Jesus, all things are possible (Luke 18:27). I read something not long ago that talked about illusions in life. Control is an illusion that makes us feel safe and secure, but the moment something happens in our life that is out of our control our whole world falls apart. We are then prisoners of our fear and anxiety, which can ultimately lead to serious depression. It's a terrible cycle that can only be stopped when we make the decision to relinquish the control we think we have and allow God to have His way in our lives.

No matter what happens, God will take care of it. If I lose my job: Matthew 6:26 tells us that our Heavenly Father feeds the birds and we are more valuable than they are. Genesis 22:14 says He is a God that provides. If I get sick: God purchased me at a high price (1 Corinthians 7:23). If God owns me, then surely he can take care of me. If someone I care about leaves me, God will never abandon me: He will never leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5). He is faithful (1 Corinthians 1:9). The Bible is full of reassurance of God's unfailing love and power. A God that healed the blind, helped the crippled walk again, brought the dead back to life, created the entire universe is the God that I want in control of my life!

It seems so simple, yet letting go of our illusion that we're in control is extremely difficult. We have to realize that we can't make people behave a certain way, we can't manipulate life to happen the way we want it to, and we can't fix every problem, but we CAN trust that it's all in the hands of our Heavenly Father. Once we truly surrender to Him, we can experience a peace that passes all understanding.

"Even though I am not in control, and that scares me, maybe this will turn out better than I ever imagined".