Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Just Let Go
These last couple of years have been quite a challenge for me in many different ways. I went through a divorce after nearly 7 years of marriage, I went back to school to become a nurse, I've had to work several part time jobs, and I've been raising 2 young children. The transition from married, stay at home mom to single, working mom and college student has been tough. Not to mention the whole post divorce emotional trauma and trying to rediscover who I am now... I've often felt completely out of control!! In the last 6 months or so I've realized something: I AM totally out of control.
When I say this what I mean is God has shown me these past few months that HE is the one in control of my life, not me. We all like to think we have control over what happens in our lives, but we don't, we only have control over how we respond to life's events. And quite honestly I'm glad I don't have the power to manipulate my life because in my selfish human nature, I would mess it up pretty bad! So why then do I live in this constant power struggle between my desires and God's will? Why, if I know He can handle things without my help, do I still fight to get my way? The same reason we all do.. we fear what we don't know.
Fear that we won't be taken care of, fear that we won't be happy, fear that we can't handle what happens to us, fear that we will lose something or someone... we live our lives in fear and this drives us to try to control every situation we encounter. What I've learned is this- I believe with all of my heart that there is absolutely nothing that has happened, is happening or will happen to me that God can’t handle. In Jesus, all things are possible (Luke 18:27). I read something not long ago that talked about illusions in life. Control is an illusion that makes us feel safe and secure, but the moment something happens in our life that is out of our control our whole world falls apart. We are then prisoners of our fear and anxiety, which can ultimately lead to serious depression. It's a terrible cycle that can only be stopped when we make the decision to relinquish the control we think we have and allow God to have His way in our lives.
No matter what happens, God will take care of it. If I lose my job: Matthew 6:26 tells us that our Heavenly Father feeds the birds and we are more valuable than they are. Genesis 22:14 says He is a God that provides. If I get sick: God purchased me at a high price (1 Corinthians 7:23). If God owns me, then surely he can take care of me. If someone I care about leaves me, God will never abandon me: He will never leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5). He is faithful (1 Corinthians 1:9). The Bible is full of reassurance of God's unfailing love and power. A God that healed the blind, helped the crippled walk again, brought the dead back to life, created the entire universe is the God that I want in control of my life!
It seems so simple, yet letting go of our illusion that we're in control is extremely difficult. We have to realize that we can't make people behave a certain way, we can't manipulate life to happen the way we want it to, and we can't fix every problem, but we CAN trust that it's all in the hands of our Heavenly Father. Once we truly surrender to Him, we can experience a peace that passes all understanding.
"Even though I am not in control, and that scares me, maybe this will turn out better than I ever imagined".
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Breathe, Pray, and Have a Little Faith
Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him -Psalm 37:7
This has become one of many Bible verses that I find myself saying over and over every single day. I even wrote it on little post it notes and stuck them all over my house. Simply put "rest in the Lord" means to be silent or still and listen to God; leaving all your problems with him without worrying about the result. "Wait patiently for Him" is exactly what it says.. wait on God to work things out with patience, faith, and confidence.
Patience is not my strength, it never has been. I'm somebody, like many people, who wants what I want when I want it. I think the way our world has become we just continue to breed impatience. We all want fast results with the least amount of work involved. People seem to rush around, going through fast food windows, passing cars on the interstate, huffing and puffing when they have to stop for a train or a red light, fighting for the shortest lines in the grocery stores... nobody wants to stop and just be in the moment. I admit I'm totally guilty of it. I will get in the express line at Walmart, the one that's like 15 items or less, and count the stuff in the cart of the person in front of me. If I count 16 you better believe I call them out on it! When I think about it, that's pretty ridiculous.
This also applies to waiting on God's timing in our everyday life. Not only does the Bible tell us that patience is the fruit of the spirit, but it also shows faith in God's ability to carry out His promises. When we attempt to control everything in our lives, we are essentially telling God that He is incapable of handling things and that we know better than He does. I'll be the first to admit that I am a control freak! I have an obsessive-compulsive personality, I'm very much type-A, and I'm extremely demanding! How does this work for me? It doesn't!!!! I've always considered myself someone of true faith when it comes to believing that God is in control. I DO believe that God is in control, but my constant worrying shows otherwise. Lately I've been learning that sometimes I just have to take a deep breath, pray, and remind myself that everything is already taken care of. God is the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end.. He already knows what my future holds and He has promised me that He'd never leave me or forsake me as I make my journey through life. Looking back on the 30 years I've been in this world, He has NEVER failed to provide or take care of me. So why should I ever doubt Him?
Many times we think God should just give us what we want immediately because we pray for it. If it's His will that we have it right away, I think He supplies our needs promptly. But oftentimes we find that His responses to our requests don't show up exactly when we want them to. We may pray over and over, continuously asking for answers or solutions to our problems, only to get nothing but silence. Does this mean God isn't listening or that He doesn't care? Absolutely not! 1 Peter 5:7 says to give all your worries to Him because He cares for you. God loves us more than we could ever comprehend and He wants nothing more than for us to be happy. I'm learning that sometimes He delays giving us the things we want because maybe we aren't ready for it. Maybe He wants us to grow in our faith, or maybe waiting will increase our desire so that we appreciate things more, or maybe there are other things in our lives that He's working out before He gives us what we desire. We just have to "rest" in Him and trust that He will not only meet our needs, but bless us with far more than we ever imagined.
I have a lot going on in my life right now and worry seems to come pretty easily for me. I pray everyday that God will take my anxiety and replace it with peace in knowing that He is in the driver's seat. I'm constantly being reminded to wait on Him, knowing that when He sees fit all my heart's desires will be satisfied. The more I study His word and read His promises, the more He proves His faithfulness. Instead of trying to control everything, I'm learning to just breathe, pray, and have a little faith :)
This has become one of many Bible verses that I find myself saying over and over every single day. I even wrote it on little post it notes and stuck them all over my house. Simply put "rest in the Lord" means to be silent or still and listen to God; leaving all your problems with him without worrying about the result. "Wait patiently for Him" is exactly what it says.. wait on God to work things out with patience, faith, and confidence.
Patience is not my strength, it never has been. I'm somebody, like many people, who wants what I want when I want it. I think the way our world has become we just continue to breed impatience. We all want fast results with the least amount of work involved. People seem to rush around, going through fast food windows, passing cars on the interstate, huffing and puffing when they have to stop for a train or a red light, fighting for the shortest lines in the grocery stores... nobody wants to stop and just be in the moment. I admit I'm totally guilty of it. I will get in the express line at Walmart, the one that's like 15 items or less, and count the stuff in the cart of the person in front of me. If I count 16 you better believe I call them out on it! When I think about it, that's pretty ridiculous.
This also applies to waiting on God's timing in our everyday life. Not only does the Bible tell us that patience is the fruit of the spirit, but it also shows faith in God's ability to carry out His promises. When we attempt to control everything in our lives, we are essentially telling God that He is incapable of handling things and that we know better than He does. I'll be the first to admit that I am a control freak! I have an obsessive-compulsive personality, I'm very much type-A, and I'm extremely demanding! How does this work for me? It doesn't!!!! I've always considered myself someone of true faith when it comes to believing that God is in control. I DO believe that God is in control, but my constant worrying shows otherwise. Lately I've been learning that sometimes I just have to take a deep breath, pray, and remind myself that everything is already taken care of. God is the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end.. He already knows what my future holds and He has promised me that He'd never leave me or forsake me as I make my journey through life. Looking back on the 30 years I've been in this world, He has NEVER failed to provide or take care of me. So why should I ever doubt Him?
Many times we think God should just give us what we want immediately because we pray for it. If it's His will that we have it right away, I think He supplies our needs promptly. But oftentimes we find that His responses to our requests don't show up exactly when we want them to. We may pray over and over, continuously asking for answers or solutions to our problems, only to get nothing but silence. Does this mean God isn't listening or that He doesn't care? Absolutely not! 1 Peter 5:7 says to give all your worries to Him because He cares for you. God loves us more than we could ever comprehend and He wants nothing more than for us to be happy. I'm learning that sometimes He delays giving us the things we want because maybe we aren't ready for it. Maybe He wants us to grow in our faith, or maybe waiting will increase our desire so that we appreciate things more, or maybe there are other things in our lives that He's working out before He gives us what we desire. We just have to "rest" in Him and trust that He will not only meet our needs, but bless us with far more than we ever imagined.
I have a lot going on in my life right now and worry seems to come pretty easily for me. I pray everyday that God will take my anxiety and replace it with peace in knowing that He is in the driver's seat. I'm constantly being reminded to wait on Him, knowing that when He sees fit all my heart's desires will be satisfied. The more I study His word and read His promises, the more He proves His faithfulness. Instead of trying to control everything, I'm learning to just breathe, pray, and have a little faith :)
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Like Mother, Like Daughter
A daughter is a mother's gender partner, her closest ally in the family confederacy, an extension of her self. And mothers are their daughters' role model, their biological and emotional road map, the arbiter of all their relationships. -Victoria Secunda
My last post was about the love story I want my daughter to grow up desiring for her life. I'm going to piggyback on that thought by telling you some things I've had on my heart this week. My daughter, 7 almost 8, is a very special child. She was my first born and her daddy was active duty air force until she was almost 4 years old. We lived in Fayetteville, NC on Ft Bragg, Pope AFB. He stayed deployed a lot so it was usually just me and her until her little brother came along. As a small child she over achieved in every area, reaching every milestone months before the "average" kid. People were shocked to hear her talk because she sounded so grown up. Even now she reads on an advanced level and seems to have a natural artistic ability. Her dad and I divorced about two years ago and he remarried within a couple of months. Needless to say, this was like turning life upside down and shaking it up for the kids. My son was 3 at the time and he seemed to handle it better. Gracey was torn apart and still questions why her family can't be together anymore. As a mom, it breaks my heart and I carry around an enormous amount of guilt. This school year we've had some issues with her behavior and I've been concerned about some things. I've spent more time these past few weeks praying for Gracey than I have her whole life. So here's what God layed on my heart:
When a shepherd finds a loyal sheep that follows him around and never leaves his side he places a bell around it's neck. The sound of the bell keeps the rest of the flock close by. This is to ensure that none of the sheep "stray" off or get into trouble, but rather stay close to the shepherd. The loyal sheep is called a bell sheep. As a mother, I am to be the bell sheep for my daughter. God is my shepherd. I can lecture her, scold her, discuss things with her, yell at her, or discipline her all day... but we all know actions speak louder than words. The best thing I can do for my little girl is to be the example she needs in her life. As the same-sex parent, I am the most influential person when it comes to teaching her how to be a Godly woman. Have I been doing this? I give myself a D+ in this area. The more God has convicted me about this subject, the more I have examined my life and I realize I haven't been measuring up. Some may say I'm too hard on myself. Let me explain:
I've heard parents say they wish kids came with instructions. Well, they do. Deuteronomy 6:5-9 says:
You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.
And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
There it is. Love God with all of yourself and let your kids see Him in your life. This is the greatest thing I can do for Gracey as her mom, and of course pray for her. Have I done this all her life? Nope. I've failed miserably. But through my prayer for her, God has shown me what I need to do. And I pray that He continues to change my heart from the inside out that I may be everything she needs. I want to be her bell sheep.
My last post was about the love story I want my daughter to grow up desiring for her life. I'm going to piggyback on that thought by telling you some things I've had on my heart this week. My daughter, 7 almost 8, is a very special child. She was my first born and her daddy was active duty air force until she was almost 4 years old. We lived in Fayetteville, NC on Ft Bragg, Pope AFB. He stayed deployed a lot so it was usually just me and her until her little brother came along. As a small child she over achieved in every area, reaching every milestone months before the "average" kid. People were shocked to hear her talk because she sounded so grown up. Even now she reads on an advanced level and seems to have a natural artistic ability. Her dad and I divorced about two years ago and he remarried within a couple of months. Needless to say, this was like turning life upside down and shaking it up for the kids. My son was 3 at the time and he seemed to handle it better. Gracey was torn apart and still questions why her family can't be together anymore. As a mom, it breaks my heart and I carry around an enormous amount of guilt. This school year we've had some issues with her behavior and I've been concerned about some things. I've spent more time these past few weeks praying for Gracey than I have her whole life. So here's what God layed on my heart:
When a shepherd finds a loyal sheep that follows him around and never leaves his side he places a bell around it's neck. The sound of the bell keeps the rest of the flock close by. This is to ensure that none of the sheep "stray" off or get into trouble, but rather stay close to the shepherd. The loyal sheep is called a bell sheep. As a mother, I am to be the bell sheep for my daughter. God is my shepherd. I can lecture her, scold her, discuss things with her, yell at her, or discipline her all day... but we all know actions speak louder than words. The best thing I can do for my little girl is to be the example she needs in her life. As the same-sex parent, I am the most influential person when it comes to teaching her how to be a Godly woman. Have I been doing this? I give myself a D+ in this area. The more God has convicted me about this subject, the more I have examined my life and I realize I haven't been measuring up. Some may say I'm too hard on myself. Let me explain:
I've heard parents say they wish kids came with instructions. Well, they do. Deuteronomy 6:5-9 says:
You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.
And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
There it is. Love God with all of yourself and let your kids see Him in your life. This is the greatest thing I can do for Gracey as her mom, and of course pray for her. Have I done this all her life? Nope. I've failed miserably. But through my prayer for her, God has shown me what I need to do. And I pray that He continues to change my heart from the inside out that I may be everything she needs. I want to be her bell sheep.
Saturday, March 17, 2012
God is the Author of my Fairy Tale
It's been about a year since I've posted anything, I guess you can say life got in the way and I got busy. I'm hoping to become more consistent with my blogs in the future and hopefully get back to writing about the things I initially intended to. A lot has happened in the past year. God has been doing some work in my life and if I were to sit and express all the things my heart feels right now it would take days... and I'd probably get pretty emotional. So I'm just going to share a summary of some things I've had on my mind today.
Many of you know I have a daughter. She's not a typical 7 year old by any stretch of the imagination, but she's smart, sensitive, creative, and so full of life. Since her dad and I divorced, she's struggled with some things and it's been a real challenge at times. I pray hard for her and I know she's going to grow up and do awesome things. As a mother of a little girl growing up in a world like we live in I find myself worrying about the temptations and pressures that are out there. I know they exist because I faced them myself. And I hate to admit it, but I made a lot of really bad decisions... well, most of my life. Thankfully I had a supportive family who loved me and prayed for me. By the grace of God I'm in a much better place in life.
One thing I want for my daughter more than anything is to grow up knowing the love of Jesus Christ. It's so easy to get caught up in society's standard of what love is. Even parents feed their little girls lies by reading them fairy tales. I was never a girly girl and I certainly never thought of myself as a princess. I don't ever remember dreaming that one day I'd grow up and be swept off my feet by a prince on a white horse. To this day my "Prince Charming" isn't a prince at all. I don't want some greek god built man in an Ralph Lauren suit making six figures and driving a BMW. I couldn't care less about a big house or fancy vacations. Those things just don't appeal to me. All that stuff is too cliche... it's not real.
So what in the world do I want then? I want LOVE. Here's what the Bible says about love:
John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.
Romans 5:8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
Ephesians 4:2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.
I could go on and on with scripture on love. The Bible tells us about God's love being unconditional, He gives us love and mercy when we least deserve it. Jesus Christ loves us so much He died for us. We are commanded to love everybody, even those who treat us wrong. The Bible also tells us that God, Himself, is love. Love isn't bought with money, earned with a college degree, or found on expensive trips to fancy islands. Love is something we find in and through a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. We cannot possibly understand how to fully give and receive love until we know the love of Jesus. I'm pretty certain Walt Disney never included any of this in his fairy tales.
So let me tell you about my "prince". I haven't met him yet... or if I have I don't know that he's the one God wants me to be with. What I do know is that he loves Jesus Christ first and foremost. I want a man who is perfectly imperfect and redeemed by the blood. I want him to know what it's like to suffer, struggle, and live completely broken. I don't mean that to sound harsh, but I'm convinced those are the people who God uses for His glory. A man who has personally faced hell on earth and was picked up off his face by God himself.. a man who has to submerge himself in Jesus just to get through the day. See, I believe this is the kind of person who knows what it means to love. Paul wrote in Ephesians chapter 5:22, "Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Lord". Now I'm a stubborn and selfish woman who will fight, kick, and scream to get my way (did I mention I'm divorced). Paul also said that husbands should love their wives as Christ so loved the church, the church being His people, who I mentioned earlier were the same people He died for. So when a man loves his wife like Jesus loves us, I think a wife "submitting" herself will come pretty naturally. My prince will know this.. because he will know Jesus... because he will have a personal relationship with Jesus that came from life experience in which he had to call on Jesus Christ to save him from himself. And if God leads me to marry a man like this, I will gladly take it on, because I know we will live a life that is pleasing in His eyes. And if God is happy, we will be happy.
This is the love story I want my daughter to know. Not the ones with glass slippers and ugly step sisters, or the one with seven midgets and talking mirrors, or the even more ridiculous ones with a mermaid who trades her voice for legs. I want her to know about the love of God and how He sent his only son to die so we will one day spend eternity in Heaven with Him. The love that He will show us through the man He will put in our life to honor and cherish us, be our spiritual leader and best friend. Disney had it all wrong, God is the author of my fairy tale :)
Many of you know I have a daughter. She's not a typical 7 year old by any stretch of the imagination, but she's smart, sensitive, creative, and so full of life. Since her dad and I divorced, she's struggled with some things and it's been a real challenge at times. I pray hard for her and I know she's going to grow up and do awesome things. As a mother of a little girl growing up in a world like we live in I find myself worrying about the temptations and pressures that are out there. I know they exist because I faced them myself. And I hate to admit it, but I made a lot of really bad decisions... well, most of my life. Thankfully I had a supportive family who loved me and prayed for me. By the grace of God I'm in a much better place in life.
One thing I want for my daughter more than anything is to grow up knowing the love of Jesus Christ. It's so easy to get caught up in society's standard of what love is. Even parents feed their little girls lies by reading them fairy tales. I was never a girly girl and I certainly never thought of myself as a princess. I don't ever remember dreaming that one day I'd grow up and be swept off my feet by a prince on a white horse. To this day my "Prince Charming" isn't a prince at all. I don't want some greek god built man in an Ralph Lauren suit making six figures and driving a BMW. I couldn't care less about a big house or fancy vacations. Those things just don't appeal to me. All that stuff is too cliche... it's not real.
So what in the world do I want then? I want LOVE. Here's what the Bible says about love:
John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.
Romans 5:8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
Ephesians 4:2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.
I could go on and on with scripture on love. The Bible tells us about God's love being unconditional, He gives us love and mercy when we least deserve it. Jesus Christ loves us so much He died for us. We are commanded to love everybody, even those who treat us wrong. The Bible also tells us that God, Himself, is love. Love isn't bought with money, earned with a college degree, or found on expensive trips to fancy islands. Love is something we find in and through a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. We cannot possibly understand how to fully give and receive love until we know the love of Jesus. I'm pretty certain Walt Disney never included any of this in his fairy tales.
So let me tell you about my "prince". I haven't met him yet... or if I have I don't know that he's the one God wants me to be with. What I do know is that he loves Jesus Christ first and foremost. I want a man who is perfectly imperfect and redeemed by the blood. I want him to know what it's like to suffer, struggle, and live completely broken. I don't mean that to sound harsh, but I'm convinced those are the people who God uses for His glory. A man who has personally faced hell on earth and was picked up off his face by God himself.. a man who has to submerge himself in Jesus just to get through the day. See, I believe this is the kind of person who knows what it means to love. Paul wrote in Ephesians chapter 5:22, "Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Lord". Now I'm a stubborn and selfish woman who will fight, kick, and scream to get my way (did I mention I'm divorced). Paul also said that husbands should love their wives as Christ so loved the church, the church being His people, who I mentioned earlier were the same people He died for. So when a man loves his wife like Jesus loves us, I think a wife "submitting" herself will come pretty naturally. My prince will know this.. because he will know Jesus... because he will have a personal relationship with Jesus that came from life experience in which he had to call on Jesus Christ to save him from himself. And if God leads me to marry a man like this, I will gladly take it on, because I know we will live a life that is pleasing in His eyes. And if God is happy, we will be happy.
This is the love story I want my daughter to know. Not the ones with glass slippers and ugly step sisters, or the one with seven midgets and talking mirrors, or the even more ridiculous ones with a mermaid who trades her voice for legs. I want her to know about the love of God and how He sent his only son to die so we will one day spend eternity in Heaven with Him. The love that He will show us through the man He will put in our life to honor and cherish us, be our spiritual leader and best friend. Disney had it all wrong, God is the author of my fairy tale :)
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Time to Clean it Up
When talking about my diet, I often use the phrase "eating clean". It's taken me a long time to realize how important "clean" eating really is, especially in terms of weight loss and body fat reduction. First, let me clarify something. When I say DIET, I'm not talking about starving myself or following some fad eating plan you get out of a book. Diet is simply defined as the kinds of food that a person habitually eats. So what does it mean to have a "clean" diet? Well, eating clean is eating the way nature intended: whole and natural. I always say if it doesn't grow in the ground, on a tree, or give birth, we shouldn't eat it. Most boxed and canned foods are loaded with chemicals and fillers that aren't meant for the human body to consume. These preservatives and processed ingredients can cause bloating, fatigue, depression, insomnia, and an inability to concentrate. Some are even thought to induce symptoms of Alzheimer's disease and certain autoimmune disorders. It's no wonder so many people are overweight and in poor health.
Clean foods are those that are lean and occur naturally- fruits, vegetables, nuts, eggs, and meat. A common excuse for eating unhealthy is the fact that fast food and junk food is less expensive and more readily available. I won't deny that produce can be overpriced, but it's ok to buy these things frozen. Frozen vegetables are much better than those in a can because they don't have all the sodium. And I realize it's much easier to go through the drive-thru at McDonald's than to sit down somewhere and eat a salad. Cook your food ahead of time and pack your lunch along with some snacks. I take food everywhere I go, and yes, I get funny looks when I pull out my grilled chicken and sweet potato or my protein shakes. But I have more energy, I'm healthy, and I love the fact that I'm maintaining a healthy weight and body fat percentage.
Eating clean is a lifestyle, not a temporary weight loss program. You have to make these changes for the right reasons and stick to it. Here are some tips to get started:
-Eliminate refined sugar
-Plan your meals and take a list to the grocery store
-Pack meals and snacks when you leave home
-Increase your water intake
-Eat 5-6 small meals throughout the day
-Never skip breakfast
-Stick with complex carbs, healthy fats, and lean sources of protein
The trick is to stay away from man-made foods and eat small portions throughout the day. This will keep your metabolism at it's highest and give you more energy to get through the day. You don't have to totally give up the foods you love. Set aside one day a week to eat 2 "cheat meals". This gives you something to look forward to, kind of a reward for doing so well the rest of the week. Just remember diet is 80% of your success or failure in any health and fitness goal. If you have any questions about what my grocery list looks like, feel free to comment on my 3in1Fitness facebook page!
Clean foods are those that are lean and occur naturally- fruits, vegetables, nuts, eggs, and meat. A common excuse for eating unhealthy is the fact that fast food and junk food is less expensive and more readily available. I won't deny that produce can be overpriced, but it's ok to buy these things frozen. Frozen vegetables are much better than those in a can because they don't have all the sodium. And I realize it's much easier to go through the drive-thru at McDonald's than to sit down somewhere and eat a salad. Cook your food ahead of time and pack your lunch along with some snacks. I take food everywhere I go, and yes, I get funny looks when I pull out my grilled chicken and sweet potato or my protein shakes. But I have more energy, I'm healthy, and I love the fact that I'm maintaining a healthy weight and body fat percentage.
Eating clean is a lifestyle, not a temporary weight loss program. You have to make these changes for the right reasons and stick to it. Here are some tips to get started:
-Eliminate refined sugar
-Plan your meals and take a list to the grocery store
-Pack meals and snacks when you leave home
-Increase your water intake
-Eat 5-6 small meals throughout the day
-Never skip breakfast
-Stick with complex carbs, healthy fats, and lean sources of protein
The trick is to stay away from man-made foods and eat small portions throughout the day. This will keep your metabolism at it's highest and give you more energy to get through the day. You don't have to totally give up the foods you love. Set aside one day a week to eat 2 "cheat meals". This gives you something to look forward to, kind of a reward for doing so well the rest of the week. Just remember diet is 80% of your success or failure in any health and fitness goal. If you have any questions about what my grocery list looks like, feel free to comment on my 3in1Fitness facebook page!
Monday, March 28, 2011
Positive Thoughts Breed Positive Actions
I remember when I was younger my mom didn't like for me to watch scary movies. To me they were harmless, but her rationale was that "what you put in your head will eventually come out". What she meant was, the things we consistently allow in our minds will inevitably be displayed through our behavior. At the time I thought it was silly, but now I see how right she was (as she was about many things!). Proverbs 4 tells us to guard our heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Matthew 15 says the things that come out of our mouth come forth from the heart. My belief is that what we let our eyes see and our ears hear will shape our minds and over time desensitize our hearts.
It's kind of like when we work around or live with pessimistic people. When you hear nothing but complaining and criticism, it's so easy to take that on. If your boss is always telling you you can't do something right, you may start to believe it. Then you become insecure about everything you do at work out of the fear of not doing anything right. Before too long, you stop being productive at all. So how do we break this vicious cycle? It all begins with how you think!
First, you have to create positive thoughts. This means looking for the good aspects of everyday life. Make a choice to face life in a way that gives you some control. We can't control what happens to us, but we can decide how we respond to it. It's that whole glass half empty or half full scenerio. You can't change your behavior until you change how you think about your situation. Second, create a positive world. Now obviously you can't make the whole planet a positive place to live, but you can change YOUR world. The people you associate with, the music you listen to, what you watch on tv, what you read... all these are factors that can affect how you perceive life. Have you ever met someone who watches nothing on tv but Fox News or CNN? They're a plethera of depressing news! Focus on the good things that are going on around us. Last, create positive actions. You'd be surprised at how smiling at someone or holding the door open for somebody can make you feel so good. Not only does it make life more pleasant, but it's contagious!
So relating this to health and fitness... change your thoughts about diet and exercise. Don't look at eating well as depriving yourself or exercise as hard work. Think of it as making healthy choices and habits to feel good, look good, and better your quality of life. Make health and fitness part of your positive world. Go for walks with your friends, hike with your kids, subscribe to health and fitness magazines, listen to motivational music, do some yoga! And finally, introduce healthy actions to your life. STOP SMOKING, drink more water, cut out the sugar, get active! You're reading this, so I know you're interested in changing your lifestyle. Let's do this!
It's kind of like when we work around or live with pessimistic people. When you hear nothing but complaining and criticism, it's so easy to take that on. If your boss is always telling you you can't do something right, you may start to believe it. Then you become insecure about everything you do at work out of the fear of not doing anything right. Before too long, you stop being productive at all. So how do we break this vicious cycle? It all begins with how you think!
First, you have to create positive thoughts. This means looking for the good aspects of everyday life. Make a choice to face life in a way that gives you some control. We can't control what happens to us, but we can decide how we respond to it. It's that whole glass half empty or half full scenerio. You can't change your behavior until you change how you think about your situation. Second, create a positive world. Now obviously you can't make the whole planet a positive place to live, but you can change YOUR world. The people you associate with, the music you listen to, what you watch on tv, what you read... all these are factors that can affect how you perceive life. Have you ever met someone who watches nothing on tv but Fox News or CNN? They're a plethera of depressing news! Focus on the good things that are going on around us. Last, create positive actions. You'd be surprised at how smiling at someone or holding the door open for somebody can make you feel so good. Not only does it make life more pleasant, but it's contagious!
So relating this to health and fitness... change your thoughts about diet and exercise. Don't look at eating well as depriving yourself or exercise as hard work. Think of it as making healthy choices and habits to feel good, look good, and better your quality of life. Make health and fitness part of your positive world. Go for walks with your friends, hike with your kids, subscribe to health and fitness magazines, listen to motivational music, do some yoga! And finally, introduce healthy actions to your life. STOP SMOKING, drink more water, cut out the sugar, get active! You're reading this, so I know you're interested in changing your lifestyle. Let's do this!
Friday, March 25, 2011
Let's Be Honest
We tell lies when we are afraid... afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing that we fear grows stronger. ~Tad Williams
Recently I've been dealing with a bit of a broken heart. I won't go into detail, but I have to say, it kind of feels like I'm 15 again. I think what hurts the worst was being lied to by someone I thought so highly of. It wasn't necessarily what was said as much as it was what wasn't admitted. And now looking back at the situation, so much pain and bitterness could have been avoided had the truth just been told. I suppose this experience is all a part of life. We live and learn, and if you're anything like me, we're so stubborn that learning is always done the hard way!
I share this because it's relevant. We all lie. Ok, so maybe we don't all flat out tell untruths, but we are all guilty of not being totally honest. As a kid I had a VERY creative imagination, I think I lied so much that I believed myself most of the time. As I've gotten older, life has shown me that it's ALWAYS better to just be honest, even when it hurts. Integrity is one of those things that once you ruin it, you can never fully redeem yourself. But what I think is worse than being dishonest with others is being dishonest with ourselves. Take a moment to think about that. Are you really honest with yourself?
When I try to do the right thing, I am my biggest stumbling block. I like to minimize my faults, justify my mistakes, and ignore the things that my pride refuses to acknowledge. But, let's be honest, if I'm having the same issues with several different people, there's a good chance I AM THE COMMON DENOMINATOR. If I can't lose that last 10 pounds because I'm a stress eater, but I refuse to accept that I bring the stress on myself, I'll never acheive my weight loss goals. How can I better myself if I can't own the things that need to be changed? Part of my overall mind, body, and spirit wellness includes my relationships with other people. It's so much easier to reach my goals in life when I have a clear conscience. So here's another challenge for you. Get honest with yourself. Think about how you contribute to your problems. What do you need to change to improve your situation? Do you need to swallow some pride and make some things right? You'll never be where you want to be until you stop avoiding the truth.
Recently I've been dealing with a bit of a broken heart. I won't go into detail, but I have to say, it kind of feels like I'm 15 again. I think what hurts the worst was being lied to by someone I thought so highly of. It wasn't necessarily what was said as much as it was what wasn't admitted. And now looking back at the situation, so much pain and bitterness could have been avoided had the truth just been told. I suppose this experience is all a part of life. We live and learn, and if you're anything like me, we're so stubborn that learning is always done the hard way!
I share this because it's relevant. We all lie. Ok, so maybe we don't all flat out tell untruths, but we are all guilty of not being totally honest. As a kid I had a VERY creative imagination, I think I lied so much that I believed myself most of the time. As I've gotten older, life has shown me that it's ALWAYS better to just be honest, even when it hurts. Integrity is one of those things that once you ruin it, you can never fully redeem yourself. But what I think is worse than being dishonest with others is being dishonest with ourselves. Take a moment to think about that. Are you really honest with yourself?
When I try to do the right thing, I am my biggest stumbling block. I like to minimize my faults, justify my mistakes, and ignore the things that my pride refuses to acknowledge. But, let's be honest, if I'm having the same issues with several different people, there's a good chance I AM THE COMMON DENOMINATOR. If I can't lose that last 10 pounds because I'm a stress eater, but I refuse to accept that I bring the stress on myself, I'll never acheive my weight loss goals. How can I better myself if I can't own the things that need to be changed? Part of my overall mind, body, and spirit wellness includes my relationships with other people. It's so much easier to reach my goals in life when I have a clear conscience. So here's another challenge for you. Get honest with yourself. Think about how you contribute to your problems. What do you need to change to improve your situation? Do you need to swallow some pride and make some things right? You'll never be where you want to be until you stop avoiding the truth.
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